


I Just Wanted To Collapse The Government

by wisefrogsingoth



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Tumblr Prompt, Writing Exercise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:40:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22698025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wisefrogsingoth/pseuds/wisefrogsingoth
Summary: Writing Prompt from TumblrHere's the prompt: https://writing-prompt-s.tumblr.com/post/190723051945/you-are-the-most-dangerous-supervillain-of-the





	I Just Wanted To Collapse The Government

You did it. You finally did it. You’d brought the Prime Minister to his knees, begging for his life. The leader of the corrupt court of demons people called the ‘Government’. 

‘Government my ass’, You thought, as you pressed the gun in your hands further into his temple. His sniveling grew louder, as the whole country watched, as the event was being televised, thanks to some threats from the most world-renowned supervillain, yourself.

You started your monologue, of which you’d worked really hard on! It was a pretty good speech, with some ‘fuck the system’, ‘corrupt people in power’, and a hint of ‘stick it to the man’. 

Once you’d wrapped it up, you pressed your mouth to the man’s ear, with the classic, “Any last words?”, as you prepared to pull the trigger.

As expected, there were no ‘last words’, only a few sobs, mixed in with pleads, with a threat or two sprinkled in. You let out your best “Hahaha! I’ve won!” laugh, as you pulled the trigger.

Or, that’s what would have happened.

If the world’s stupidest ‘superhero’ hadn’t stepped in.

They had been a person of interest over the last few weeks, as they’d kept foiling your dastardly schemes. An incident of note had been last Tuesday, when you’d been robbing that bank for the funds to build your new lair. 

You were about to get into the getaway car, when the weirdo in question, masked and in spandex, had rocked up, talking about how they’d ‘foil your plans’, and that ‘you wouldn’t get away with this!’. If it had been anyone else, you would’ve had Justin (a classmate who had nothing better to do) shoot them point blank, but, surprising even yourself, you’d told your guys to get in the car, and, regrettably, told Amy (your roommate who was looking for some thrills) to floor it.

You’d gotten away (duh), but the car chase was NOT good for your motion sickness. The hero had shown up at a few other of your crimes, trying to stop you, and, for some reason, you could never bring yourself to hurt them. 

So, when they somehow got past your impeccably trained security (your mom’s dog), and shielded the Prime Minister with their body, you just barely kept your cool.

“Hey, dude? Could you move over a bit? I’m trying to collapse the government here, and you’re in the way.” Maybe being polite would work, they seemed reasonable. 

“What!? No way? Why did you think I’d agree to that when you’re trying to shoot the Prime Minister!” Nope, not reasonable at all.

“Fine. I’ll just have to shoot through you then.” Yup. You could totes shoot through them if you wanted.

“You won’t do it. You’re too good.” WOW. This spiel? Gag. 

“You don’t even know me. I’m absolutely gonna shoot through you now.” 

“Well I probably do, seeing as you haven’t ‘shot through me’ yet. How do you even know that’s gonna work?” Shit. You’d been got. Act. Cool.

“Listen, I’d definitely shoot through you, but I’ve got a thing at five, so… yeah. Bye.” Smooth.

“Looks like I’ve foiled your plans again. Better luck next time!” Smug asshole.

You were still thinking about them hours later, on the couch with Amy.

“Why didn’t you just shoot them?” She’d ask.

“Shut up.” You threw your pillow at her, as she cackled like a witch.

“Somebody’s got a cruuush~!” 

Your face turned red, as you elbowed Amy off the couch.

You secretly hoped they’d show up to your next crime, too.


End file.
